Food jokes Jokes Funny Food jokes Jokes
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There are 121 Food jokes Jokes in this category.
A friend and I were standing in from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
A friend and I were standing in line at a fast-food restaurant, waiting to place our order. There was a big sign posted. "No bills larger than $20 will be accepted." The woman in front of us, pointing to the sign, remarked, "Believe me, if I HAD a bill larger than $20, I wouldn't be eating here."
A friend and I were standing in line at a fast-food restaurant, waiting to place our order. There was a big sign posted. "No bills larger than $20 will be accepted." The woman in front of us, pointing to the sign, remarked, "Believe me, if I HAD a bill larger than $20, I wouldn't be eating here."
A lady was picking through the frozen from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."
Q Ever wonder about people who pay from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
Q: Ever wonder about people who pay $2 for a bottle of Evian water? A: Just spell "Evian" backwards!
Q: Ever wonder about people who pay $2 for a bottle of Evian water? A: Just spell "Evian" backwards!
An elderly couple were killed in an from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
An elderly couple were killed in an accident and found themselves being given a tour of heaven by Saint Peter. "Here is your oceanside condo, over there are the tennis courts, swimming pool, and two golf courses. If you need any refreshments, just stop by any of the many bars located throughout the area." "Heck, Gloria," the old man hissed when Saint Peter walked off, "we could have been here ten years ago if you hadn't heard about all that stupid oat bran, wheat germ, and low-fat diets!"
An elderly couple were killed in an accident and found themselves being given a tour of heaven by Saint Peter. "Here is your oceanside condo, over there are the tennis courts, swimming pool, and two golf courses. If you need any refreshments, just stop by any of the many bars located throughout the area." "Heck, Gloria," the old man hissed when Saint Peter walked off, "we could have been here ten years ago if you hadn't heard about all that stupid oat bran, wheat germ, and low-fat diets!"
Johnny Daddy are caterpillars good to eatFather from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
Johnny: Daddy, are caterpillars good to eat? Father: Have I not told you never to mention such things during meals! Mother: Why did you say that, Junior? Why did you ask the question? Johnny: It's because I saw one on daddy's lettuce, but now it's gone.
Johnny: Daddy, are caterpillars good to eat? Father: Have I not told you never to mention such things during meals! Mother: Why did you say that, Junior? Why did you ask the question? Johnny: It's because I saw one on daddy's lettuce, but now it's gone.
In February in New Brighton Minn a from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
In February 1994 in New Brighton, Minn., a 32-year-old man and his 24-year-old girlfriend were arrested after a food fight in a grocery store. After arguing loudly, the couple began throwing sweet potatoes at each other. Eventually, the man allegedly threw the woman into several vegetable racks, sending the contents spilling to the floor. As both continued to brawl on the floor, she allegedly stuffed lettuce into the man's mouth.
In February 1994 in New Brighton, Minn., a 32-year-old man and his 24-year-old girlfriend were arrested after a food fight in a grocery store. After arguing loudly, the couple began throwing sweet potatoes at each other. Eventually, the man allegedly threw the woman into several vegetable racks, sending the contents spilling to the floor. As both continued to brawl on the floor, she allegedly stuffed lettuce into the man's mouth.
When the waitress in a New York from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
When the waitress in a New York City restaurant brought him the soup du jour, the Englishman was a bit dismayed. "Good heavens," he said, "what is this?" "Why, it's bean soup," she replied. "I don't care what it has been," he sputtered. "What is it now?"
When the waitress in a New York City restaurant brought him the soup du jour, the Englishman was a bit dismayed. "Good heavens," he said, "what is this?" "Why, it's bean soup," she replied. "I don't care what it has been," he sputtered. "What is it now?"
I thought you were trying to get from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
I thought you were trying to get into shape? I am. The shape I've selected is a triangle.
I thought you were trying to get into shape? I am. The shape I've selected is a triangle.
Sign in restaurant window Eat now Pay from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
Sign in restaurant window: "Eat now - Pay waiter."
Sign in restaurant window: "Eat now - Pay waiter."
Overweight is something that just sort of from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
Overweight is something that just sort of snacks up on you.
Overweight is something that just sort of snacks up on you.
A friend got some vinegar in his from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
A friend got some vinegar in his ear, now he suffers from pickled hearing.
A friend got some vinegar in his ear, now he suffers from pickled hearing.
The four food groups Fast Frozen Instant from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
The four food groups: Fast, Frozen, Instant, and Chocolate.
The four food groups: Fast, Frozen, Instant, and Chocolate.
A couple of kids tried using pickles from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
A couple of kids tried using pickles for a Ping-Pong game. They had the volley of the Dills.
A couple of kids tried using pickles for a Ping-Pong game. They had the volley of the Dills.
A new chef from India was fired from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
A new chef from India was fired a week after starting the job. He keep favoring curry.
A new chef from India was fired a week after starting the job. He keep favoring curry.
The snack bar next door to an from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
The snack bar next door to an atom smasher was called "The Fission Chips."
The snack bar next door to an atom smasher was called "The Fission Chips."
On April Fools Day a mother put from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
On April Fools Day, a mother put a fire cracker under the pancakes. She blew her stack.
On April Fools Day, a mother put a fire cracker under the pancakes. She blew her stack.
A family of three tomatoes were walking from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
A family of three tomatoes were walking downtown one day when the little baby tomato started lagging behind. The big father tomato walks back to the baby tomato, stomps on her, squashing her into a red paste, and says, "Ketchup!"
A family of three tomatoes were walking downtown one day when the little baby tomato started lagging behind. The big father tomato walks back to the baby tomato, stomps on her, squashing her into a red paste, and says, "Ketchup!"
A customer was bothering the waiter in from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
A customer was bothering the waiter in a restaurant. First, he asked that the air conditioning be turned up because he was too hot, then he asked it be turned down cause he was too cold, and so on for about half an hour. Surprisingly, the waiter was very patient, he walked back and forth and never once got angry. So finally, a second customer asked him why he didn't throw out the pest. "Oh, I really don't care or mind," said the waiter with a smile. "We don't even have an air conditioner."
A customer was bothering the waiter in a restaurant. First, he asked that the air conditioning be turned up because he was too hot, then he asked it be turned down cause he was too cold, and so on for about half an hour. Surprisingly, the waiter was very patient, he walked back and forth and never once got angry. So finally, a second customer asked him why he didn't throw out the pest. "Oh, I really don't care or mind," said the waiter with a smile. "We don't even have an air conditioner."
A customer was bothering the waiter in from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
A customer was bothering the waiter in a restaurant. First, he asked that the air conditioning be turned up because he was too hot, then he asked it be turned down cause he was too cold, and so on for about half an hour. Surprisingly, the waiter was very patient, he walked back and forth and never once got angry. So finally, a second customer asked him why he didn't throw out the pest. "Oh, I really don't care or mind," said the waiter with a smile. "We don't even have an air conditioner."
A customer was bothering the waiter in a restaurant. First, he asked that the air conditioning be turned up because he was too hot, then he asked it be turned down cause he was too cold, and so on for about half an hour. Surprisingly, the waiter was very patient, he walked back and forth and never once got angry. So finally, a second customer asked him why he didn't throw out the pest. "Oh, I really don't care or mind," said the waiter with a smile. "We don't even have an air conditioner."
One day Bill and Tom went to from Flashcomment Food jokes Jokes
One day, Bill and Tom went to a restaurant for dinner. As soon as the waiter took out two steaks, Bill quickly picked out the bigger steak for himself. Tom wasn't happy about that: "When are you going to learn to be polite?" Bill: "If you had the chance to pick first, which one would you pick?" Tom: "The smaller piece, of course." Bill: "What are you whining about then? The smaller piece is what you want, right?"
One day, Bill and Tom went to a restaurant for dinner. As soon as the waiter took out two steaks, Bill quickly picked out the bigger steak for himself. Tom wasn't happy about that: "When are you going to learn to be polite?" Bill: "If you had the chance to pick first, which one would you pick?" Tom: "The smaller piece, of course." Bill: "What are you whining about then? The smaller piece is what you want, right?"
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